This morning I was watching Music Choice Soundscapes and discovered that there is a new age artist with the unfortunate name of Richard Bone. Seriously, what were his parents thinking? At what time in his school life do you think he ran off the bus, into the house screaming at his parents telling them he hated them for giving him such a name. I can see it now, "I don't want to be a Dick, I don't want to be a Dick!"
Yup. This guy's got it rough. I am of a generation that calls no one Dick, well, not in a complimentary sense anyway. Unless you instruct me to call you that, I am not even going there. And, even if you instruct me to call you Dick, I am going to feel strange about it. But this guy...this guy's name just makes you want to call him Dick. Odds are that even if you are introduced to him as Richard Bone, you are immediately thinking, Dick Bone.
My name is Jennifer and people constantly nickname me Jen or Jenny upon meeting me because I am pretty gregarious. Imagine being this guy. He can't win. If he's friendly, people are going to want to nickname him, and I'm guessing they try to call him Rich or Rick, but you know from time to time a "Dick" is slipping out (which sounds bad, but, well...you know). If he's an ass, people that get a bad first impression are also going to want to call him Dick. Yup, life is hard for Dick, uh, I mean Richard.
Oh, and while we are on the subject of Dicks, I am also pretty sure the name Dick is partially responsible for why the country is so messed up right now. Think about the White House years just before Obama. We had George Bush and Dick Cheney running things. Isn't that weird? What do you think the odds were of having a Dick and a Bush in the White House at the same time? I'm just saying, a lot of people seemed surprised when things started heading south, but not me. As I always said during those years, "what did you think was going to happen with a Bush and a Dick in the White House? Things were bound to get f**ked up." People thought I was crass. Oh, sure, crass, but right.
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